Filled Up or Poured Out

I have a confession to make.  

I'm a bucket list hater.

{Did you read Ann Voskamp's post today? The one that made me realize  I'm not the only bucket list Scrooge. ;-) }

I feel anti-American just typing that!  It's not the dreaming, but the sentiment that we all somehow deserve a super awesome life full of what we want that makes me cringe.  Of course, a life of ease and interesting experiences is appealing to me.  Safe sounds nice too - I am a first born girl, you know!

However, God is growing my desire to be poured out and risk for the sake of Christ.  To come to the end of life emptied of myself, not filled up with checklists detailing things I've done, places I've gone, and a grudge for the things left unchecked.

Trust me, it doesn't come naturally.  Often times I kick and scream against it; working hard to stay upright and full.  I'm praying for grace in the tipping and pouring out of my life.